Fear is a prison.

Sees me, knows me, and still loves me in spite of me.

Prayer for early dismissal...

SusieQ: "Do you think they'll let us leave early tomorrow even though we're leaving early Tuesday?"
Me: "We should probably pray about it. Dear sweet Brown baby jeebus please give the tin man a heart and the scarecrow a brain and the lion some courage and let Dorothy find her way back home. But most importantly jeebus, let these fools let us leave early tomorrow. Mama really needs a break. Amen"
SusieQ: "Amen"

Sure hope this works.

Update: Thank You jeebus :-)

Stability.
Not too much to ask.
I know nothing is ever guaranteed, but the promise of some form of stability is what I crave. What I need.
I want so badly to let someone in, to trust whole heartedly, to allow myself to be vulnerable with someone. To crawl out of this shell and lie completely naked bearing my soul without reservation. 
Freedom.

Stubborn
Stuck in my ways
Selfish
Insecure
Needy
Elusive
Difficult to read
Stingy with the goods
Over analytical
Spoiled
Nonchalant...
Sensitive
Inquisitive
Unfiltered
Impulsive

*sigh*
I'm sure I missed something.

Secretive! Forgot that one.

I am fucking imperfect.
I own that.

Now show me your flaws...

Sometimes you have to be broken down to your lowest common denominator in order to build yourself up again.
Thank you.

I swear. What I'm about to do won't hurt a bit...but you have to trust me...or else it won't work...
(snickers)

Maaaan...

Fuck that shit.

We are both fools fooling ourselves and each other.

6-21-2012

Some people, and by people I mean Libra men, tend to lash out at and push away those closest to them in times of struggle and/or uncertainty. They keep at arms length the ones they "love"; the ones who tell them the truth even when they don't want to hear it, and embrace those they don't know very well. The perfect stangers that blow smoke, feed their ego, and tell them what they want to to hear blinding them from the truth. The ones with hidden agendas and  underlying ulterior motives.
I guess they're more in love with the fallacy than the reality.

Just as confused as I was before I sat my ass in that car.
This can't be life.

You think you're in Love? Live with his/her ass for two months and then tell me how in love you are. Oh you'll still love em, if the love was real to begin with. But you sure as hell won't like em very much.

"Listen, smile, agree, then do whatever the fuck you were gonna do anyway."
-Robert Downey Jr.

Aarrrg!!!

FUCKING Libra men!

If the men that I date are a mere reflection of me, I've got some serious 'splaining to do.

A piece of cake you're not. Maybe a piece of pi as in what's the square root of pi...difficult to figure out without a calculator.

6-15-13

Motor pony.

Some sound advice from a good friend.

Watch "Lalah Hathaway ft. Marcus Miller - All This Time" on YouTube

Reminds me of what it's like to really love someone and have that love returned.

"I'm going to dream, me on top, deep inside, no strokes, just deep inside...continuous kisses, smiles, some whispers... holding hands... closer than two, more like one... no strokes... just together... deep inside..."

Fucking Libra men.

It sucks when the one you want is right next to you and you can't even touch them.

I was told that a little more fruit in my diet will make my honeypot that much sweeter.

I love you.
So simple.
So complex.

It is officially official.

I Am Joy.

"Difficult for the sake of being difficult..."
I don't think that's me...is it?

A home divided is no home at all.

” Don't put your trust in walls 'cause walls will only crush you when they fall...”             
                        -Ray Lamontagne

Hand prints on my ass
They caught me by surprise those
Hand prints on my ass..

(snap snap snap snap)